i’m 16 again
wrapped in pink satin
like the slippers I wore at ten
kept company by crumbs in the bed
3 days strewn about the floor
i’m 16
before i got the keys
mama can you drop me off?
the boy that I loved
is a 5-minute drive away
i'm 16 again
the usual haunts
are overtaken by ghosts
in their gaping holes
i see my myself
I'm 16
dreaming
of what lies behind these walls
beyond city limits
places i shouldn't go
the ones that were made for me
i'm 16 again
fearful of father
he is taller than before
it may be that i am smaller
looking down into my eyes he sees himself
i'm 16
bleeding out on my
bedroom floor
cold blue liquid seeping
into the carpet"
i’m sorry mama for the stain
i'm 16 again
and i want to be wanted
i want to be missed
i want to be loved
i want to not have to want
I’m 19
wrapped in pink satin
walls are bare
stripped of their life
boxed up and shipped away
i’m 19
leafing through old favorites
on streets that remain the same
hoping someone might stop
to take notice this time
i’m nineteen
sitting in this room
bleeding onto its floor
next to that blue spot
feeling the edges
i'm sixteen again
By Anaiis Rios-Kasoga
